Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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