i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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