I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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