I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Why are your pants in the freezer?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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