Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Quick, to the slutcave!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
