im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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