So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Randomize
