Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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