garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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