I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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