If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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