Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
