That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
