What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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