Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
