my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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