You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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