Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
