I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I don't think brook has ever known best
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize