I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
