I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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