We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
