white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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