we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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