part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
