Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
