It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
We got so high we made milksteak
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
