She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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