They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
