is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize