two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
