isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We left an ass print on the piano.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
