Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
