I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
