my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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