what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
