Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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