oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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