so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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