wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
