WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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