i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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