So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
