Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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