It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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