I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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