The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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