i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
