that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
