i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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