garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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